A spreader bar is a bondage play accessory primarily built around a metal or wooden bar. It features multiple cuff attachment points you can fasten to the submissive’s ankles, wrists, or thighs to spread and hold their legs apart. The spreader bar is used in BDSM play or bedroom bondage with other BDSM equipment. Once worn, the bar immobilizes and provides easier access. Spreader bars can range anywhere from 12inches to 38inches.
Benefits of using a spreader bar in BDSM play.
• It forces your partners legs to stay open so you can continue until reaching the max pleasure.
• Exposes the erogenous areas making it easier for your partner to stimulate you. • Puts your partner on display.
• Brings excitement by being at the full mercy to your partner and being restrained.
• Is a great position enhancer allowing you to concentrate more on being relaxed and having a good time.
• Not limited to BDSM can be used to spice up any moment.
How to choose the right spreader bar for you
When looking at the ‘perfect’ spreader bar for yourself and your partner it is important to take into consideration what you are wanting it for and what feels the most comfortable for yourself. The two most common things people look for is the type of material it’s made out of as the metal ones can be sturdier than the nylon ones but the nylon ones can be used to wrap around bed heads and more. They also look for the different attachments it comes with or can be added. Going for the ‘traditional’ metal or nylon spreader with the ankle cuffs at either end lets you explore a few different positions like standing doggy or the Y-position. But if you were wanting something a bit more intermediate than adding wrist cuffs would make it a bit more interesting.
How to Use the BDSM Spreader Bar for Maximum Pleasure
If restrictive role play is something you’re into or just wanting to give over control for a night? A spreader bar can do just that, using a spreader can be highly arousing and freeing. Giving complete control of your erogenous zones to your partner can produce maximum pleasure as your partner plays with all your senses, using the bars in a more restrictive position where it limits your movement can allow your partner to consensually keep going until you’re begging them to stop
How to Incorporate a Spreader Bar into your BDSM Scenes
Introducing any sex toy into the bedroom can be daunting if you’ve never broached the subject before, but it isn’t impossible. Whether you get a “yes”, “maybe” or an absolute “no” from your partner can come largely down to your delivery, as well as whether they’re interested in trying the toy you’re suggesting (obviously). Regardless of your delivery, you must always remember that what is a turn-on for you may be a total no-go for your partner, and you must be respectful of that. “When someone is unwilling to try something new in the bedroom, their rejection often comes from a place of fear or lack of knowledge,” explains Wilde. “This is why it’s important for your suggestion to come across as an invitation to your partner, rather than a request. If you make it clear this idea is for both of your benefits, you’re more likely to be greeted with questions and curiosity than fear and rejection.”
Recommended Accessories to Enhance your BDSM Spreader Bar Experience
Most spreader bars come with attached cuffs but if not then a pair of wrist or ankle cuffs or both would be a great choice to enhance a spreader bar. Following that would be a blind fold possibly or even a vibrator just to enhance the pleasure. Then you can let your imagination take control and start adding products that you have always wanted to try or some old favourites.
Spreader Bar Sex Toys FAQs
How do I clean and care for my BDSM spreader bar?
Cleaning and caring for your spreader bar are very simple, after use you want to spray your bar with antibacterial spray then wipe down your bar. Depending if you have a metal or nylon bar requires different types of care; if you have a metal bar and if your bar can be broken down, you want to break it down and store it away in and if you have a nylon bar you can either want to role it up and store it back in its box or hang it up somewhere safe.
What are some safety tips for using a BDSM spreader bar?
Safety tips: • Work your way up in sizes of Spreader bars. • Consent. Always make sure both parties agree to what’s happening. • Start off easy with the first bar then once comfortable you can move on to more advanced bars. • Always pick a spreader bar that feels comfortable for you. • Always have a “Safe word” for when you are at your limitation. • Check your circulation. If something doesn’t feel right say something. • Always make sure the spreader bar feels secure and safe.
How to introduce bondage to my relationship?
Introducing a new toy into the bedroom can be somewhat daunting but it’s all about communication! Seat down and talk to your partner about wanting to try something new and that a spreader bar might be something you both can enjoy. After talking about it and getting consent from both parties, start off with a simple spreader bar like a thigh spreader bar or a simple metal or nylon depending on your preferences of material. Then just take it slow no need to rush as this may be something you are both experiencing for the first time. Its all about consent and communication.
